


First Steps to Healing

by A Magiluna Stormwriter (ariestess)



Series: #666foryou [96]
Category: Damien (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Epistolary, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-02
Updated: 2016-07-02
Packaged: 2018-07-19 19:38:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7374757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariestess/pseuds/A%20Magiluna%20Stormwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are no words to adequately explain the gaping wound in my heart and my life without you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Steps to Healing

**Author's Note:**

> Date Written: 2 July 2016  
> Word Count: 482  
> Written for: virgo_397  
> Prompt: 54. things you always meant to say but never got the chance  
> Summary: There are no words to adequately explain the gaping wound in my heart and my life without you.  
> Spoilers: Post-series, nebulously set in the first two weeks after the events of the series finale. Beyond that, everything we learned in these 10 episodes is up for grabs.  
> Warnings: No standard warnings apply.  
> Series: #666foryou  
> Website: ShatterStorm Productions – Doggie Duo  
> Link to: http://bdkk.shatterstorm.net/   
> Archive: ShatterStorm Productions & AO3 only…all others ask for permission & we'll see…  
> Feedback: Constructive criticism is always welcome.
> 
> Author’s Disclaimer: "Damien," "The Omen," the characters, and situations depicted are the property of Glen Mazarra, David Seltzer, 20th Century Fox Television, Fox 21, and A&E Television Networks. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. This site is in no way affiliated with "Damien," "The Omen," A&E, or any representatives of the actors.
> 
> Author’s Notes: Well, this one turned out a little differently for me. First off, the entire time I was writing it, I had the Genesis song, "Mama" playing in Spotify. That said, I'm still not entirely sure I can wrap my brain around Ann Rutledge keeping any sort of journals or the like, and yet, I can see her giving it a chance to help work through her grief over her daughter's death. Whether this happens in an actual bound book, or is simply a series of letters on expensive stationery is still up for grabs. But she needs a valid outlet for her grief, and she definitely doesn't strike me as the kind of person who can utilize a psychologist, given the enormity of the Antichrist in her life.
> 
> Dedication: This is part of a series of stories to thank the phenomenal creative team of _Damien_ , both in front of and behind the camera.
> 
> Beta: theonlyspl

My dearest Veronica,

I'm not even sure why I've chosen to do this. It's not as if you'll ever see these pages. Perhaps this is all Simone's influence after all. She confided in doing this for her sister. It's supposed to be cathartic somehow. We shall see if it is or not.

And look at that. Already I'm disparaging something for being beneath me and trivial. Sometimes I make things worse for myself by being too rigid, too set in my ways. And while that can be useful sometimes, it's not fitting to process grief, is it?

I miss you.

There are no words to adequately explain the gaping wound in my heart and my life without you. I do what I must to remain strong for your brother as he ascends to his rightful power, but I wish you could be here to be involved in all of this happening. He and I could both use your steady presence. So many things are happening, so many changes shaking up the organization and all of our lives.

I miss you so much.

I need you here with me, helping me take the reins of the organization. John is dead. His avarice and need for power overrode any rationality about what we've been preparing for all these centuries. The hounds took him out after Damien learned of John's part in Amani Golkar's death.

I shouldn't have been so hard on you about him. I could see that you had developed feelings for him, and his reaction when we stumbled upon your body was nearly as powerful as mine. Perhaps if I'd done things differently, handled the situation better, you'd both still be here, stepping into prominent roles in your brother's ascension. But without Golkar's death, and the shooting of Simone Baptiste, Damien would never have accepted what he is meant to be.

It's funny; four people linked to your brother have ultimately died because of guns. Five, if you count Robert Thorn. Well, I suppose technically Simone is an outlier, since Damien brought her back to life in acquiescing to his destiny.

Please don't think that I didn't consider asking him to bring you back. Because I did. I still do, but I fear too much time has passed. Would you even want to come back at this point? I don't even know if he can do anything like that. Simone was a special case, I think.

I'm sorry, Veronica. I'm so, so sorry for so many things I did and didn't do over the years, things that could have made us closer.

I wish you could have known, before you died, just what you have always meant to me, how much I have always loved you.

You will always be in my thoughts and my heart, as you have been from the moment I first knew you existed.

I love you.

Mom


End file.
